Testimonies

I had 1 particular assualt experience, I was 13, he was older than me. I do believe that he just was not educated to know that what he did was not OK. I strongly believe education would have prevented this. I didn't know it was an assault situation till I was in my 20s and realised that was not OK.

When I was in year 9, I sent photos to a boy at a Boys private school because I felt bad for him and he pressured me and it ended getting to what seemed like the entire year of his school and people always tell me how stupid I was to send to him, and now they have a name for that photo and joke about it. Even my male best friend had them and didn't tell me and when I asked him to delete them, he hesitated.

In my second year of uni in 2018, I was convinced by my first boyfriend into oral sex in a public bathroom. I regret this, and wish I had had the confidence to reject his advances at the time. He was a bit younger than me.

In 2014, I was 15 and in grade 11. I was interested in a boy in grade 12. He lied to me about being a virgin so I would feel more comfortable losing my virginity. We had slept together a few times across a couple of months. One day, I went to his house after school and consented to sex. Throughout the encounter, I changed my mind and said I wanted to go home but he did not stop. He was my ride home as I didn't have my license. Before driving me home we went to his footy game where he proceeded to gloat to his footy friends about how rough the encounter was that it broke the bed. After he dropped me home he ignored me from there on.

He graduated from X College (Melbourne) in 2014. It was pitch black. I asked him if he had a condom. He went to his bag and fumbled around - it sounded like he was looking for a condom. He came back - I assumed he'd found one and put it on. It didn't occur to me that I could or should check. We had sex. I only realised he hadn't put on a condom when I felt his semen dribble out afterwards. I didn't consent to unprotected sex.

I was dating a boy from X when I was 14, I wasn't ready to have sex and I was willing to perform other sex acts so he would stop pressuring me. However, he was telling all his friends that we were having sex 24/7. I didn't find out until after we had broken up and one of his friends told me that they have been laughing and talking about how slutty I am behind my back for months.

I was in year 10 and my friends and I were at a house party (during the day) with some older boys. When I went to go and get something out my bag in one of the rooms, one of the boys came in after me and locked the door. He asked repeatedly for sex and despite me saying no every time he kept asking whilst trying to take my pants off. I went to try and unlock the door but he stood in the way. I eventually felt/realised that the only way I was going to get out of the room and back to my friends was if I just said yes to him. So I did. And then half way through he said to me 'you wanted this right?', purely asking that because he did legal studies and knew that if i said no then that should have meant no. I have been afraid that I would at somepoint see him again since this happened. I am disappointed because i expected better of someone who was older than me.

I dated a guy and we did it a couple times and it started to get more and more uncomfortable for me. I kept saying that I didn't want to but he'd keep pushing. He never physically forced me so even though I felt really bad afterwards I'd think to myself that I loved him so it was ok and he didn't force me at all. In reality he did and he raped me. It took me a year to fully realise that it was rape and that he'd done so several times. I moved to Ravenswood and we had a talk given and the speaker mentioned what consent actually is and I sat with him afterwards in tears and thanked him for telling me what I needed to know. To be honest I don't think that my ex knew what he was doing was wrong and I didn't either. It was because he didn't have the education to know how serious it was and I didn't have the education allowing me to understand my own basic rights. I was 14. Education about this at a younger age would have saved me years of questioning 'was I raped or is it not that bad?'

He was my boyfriend at the time, in fact, he was my first boyfriend and we were both virgins. Throughout our relationship he would always pressure me into doing sexual things with him, he would always repeatedly ask if he could see me naked/topless and if he could touch my breasts/butt. My answer was always no until he started touching me without even asking anymore. One day when we were together sitting on a hill in a park he kept trying to put his hands below the waistbelt of my tights that I was wearing. I kept saying no and pulling his hand away. He tried 4-5 times before he shoved his hand underneath my underwear and started masturbating me. I was so shocked from the pain and the action of what he has just done that I stopped saying no, but I never once said yes. He continued until he had enough. I always thought because he was my boyfriend that its okay and he had a right to do that. It wasnt until a speaker came to my school and clearly outlined what the lawful definition of rape and sexual assult is. The worst part is he probably didnt know what he was doing was wrong, and he will probably never know until proper education is put in place.

I was 15 and with my first boyfriend, I was a virgin (never had penetrative sex). We had talked about having sex and I had expressed I was open to it in the future but not ready yet. I said I didn't want to have sex that day because it was much too early, too soon and it didn't feel special at all. That same night he pressured me into having sex with him, was so relentless about it that it was easier to just do it than not and continue facing the harassment . I said no 10-15 times until giving in. I felt like he was entitled to me as his girlfriend and that I owed him something. I now realise this situation was extremely manipulated and he completely disregarded my consent, and that this was actually a form of sexual assault.

When I was at schoolies I was hooking up with a friend and he was wanting to have sex which I repeatedly said no that I didn't want to have sex with him. He said fine and we went back to just kissing, he grabbed a condom and I said again that I didn't want to have sex with him but this time he didn't take no for an answer. I haven't seen him since.

My third year of uni I ran into a boy, we had a drink and kissed outside, he seemed to take that as an invitation and proceeded to pull my undies down and sexually assault me, deaf to me saying no.

The boy tried to pressure me to have sex without protection, but I insisted and told him numerous times that I wasn't on any birth control. He then deliberately removed the condom whilst we were having sex and I didn't realise until he had finished. I confronted him afterwards and he admitted saying "it feels better without it." I ended up having to get the morning after pill and an STI check. I felt extremely violated and only realised that this act not only had a name, but was also a form of sexual assault after I had spoken with my friends about it many months later.

We went back to my place after drinking. I asked if we could not have sex because I actually did like him and wanted to slow down. He lay on top of me and wouldn't let me move, telling me that that's what the night was meant for and , after I repeatedly told him no means no, he says 'but no can sometimes mean yes'. I knew he wouldn't let me go without having sex so I just lay there and cried while he penetrated me and then left my own home to walk for hours in the streets alone because I felt so anxious and dirty. When I got home he had masturbated in my bed and then asked if I wanted to 'get breaky'.

I can honestly think of 5 instances of rape or assault that I was the victim of. The individuals (plural) forced me to perform oral sex on them on several occasions using coercion and lies, then proceeded to bully and harass me as an 'ugly slut' and made up stories like 'i bit them' and to a point where I had to leave the school. They continued to harass and bully me via social media (at the time it was MSN messenger) even though I changed schools.