What is sexual harassment and sexual assault?

“Where do we draw the line of what is sexual assault and what is sexual harassment?”

“Is it sexual harassment to touch someone on a non-sexual body part but without their permission?”

“Is kissing someone when they don’t want it assault?”

A lot of people have questions about the terms “sexual assault” and “sexual harassment”. 

We hear these two terms discussed in the media, at school, uni, and work, but what they mean on their own and the difference between the terms can be unclear.While they’re deeply connected, there are key differences between the two, especially when legal definitions come into play. 

Keep in mind; no matter the definition or difference, both cause serious harm — and that's the key message here. 

When we learn what sexual assault and sexual harassment are, we’re better equipped to recognise when it’s happening, and feel encouraged to take action to prevent it. 

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What is sexual assault and sexual harrasment? 

Sexual assault is when a person is physically or emotionally forced, coerced or tricked in to anything sexual against their will or without their consent. 

When we hear the words sexual assault, our minds tend to focus on physically violent acts of rape. This is one act that falls within the definition, but sexual assault also includes things like:

• Someone’s partner verbally pressuring them into doing things in bed they’re not comfortable with, or feel ready for, and they eventually give in because they feel afraid or like they have to.
• Forcing someone to have unprotected sex when they’ve asked to use a condom. 
• Someone doing sexual acts to another person who is either half asleep, passed out, or too drunk/high to be able to consent. 

Sexual harassment is any unwanted sexual behaviour which makes someone feel uncomfortable, scared, intimidated or disrespected. It’s still sexual harassment even if you didn’t intend to make someone feel that way — the impact is what matters.

This can be unwanted touching without consent — for instance, someone brushing their hand against your thigh in a way that feels deliberate. Or an action which is purposefully intimidating, like a stranger at a bus stop persistently staring at you unpleasantly. 

Sexual harassment isn’t contained to physical, in-person acts. It includes things like:

• Someone making a gross comment about what they’d like to do you sexually at a bar
• A friend making a sexual and objectifying joke about another person’s body
• Sending on someone else’s nude without consent, or showing someone pornography out of the blue

Technology-facilitated abuse, which is when someone uses technology to harm someone, can be of a sexual nature and constitute sexual violence. In Australia, image-based and online abuse is illegal. Technology-facilitated abuse can look like:

• Being sent sexually explicit messages or pictures without consent
• Pressuring someone to send nudes
• Sharing on someone’s nudes without their consent 
• Commenting with sexual jokes or threats on someone's post

What are the legalities?

Sexual harassment and sexual assault are legally treated as two distinct offences, with consequences depending on the severity of the situation, and the state or territory in which it happened. 

While it’s important to understand the laws surrounding sexual harassment and assault, approaching all of this only through what ‘is and is not’ legal can miss the bigger picture.  

Sexual harassment and assault can cause serious emotional, mental and social harm which extends way beyond the courts. It’s important to think about how our actions affect others — not just to stay out of trouble, but because we care about treating people with respect and keeping everyone safe. Plus, we want to have fun, pleasurable sexual experiences that don’t hurt or harm people!

Sometimes people assume that because the law has different categories for sexual harassment and assault, it means one is less serious than the other. Like saying:

“It was just catcalling — it’s not like they even touched you.”

But that kind of thinking really misses the point. Comparing harm like that can make someone feel like what happened to them doesn’t matter.

It also doesn’t recognise the ways a remark, ‘a joke,’ or a stare can chip away at someone’s confidence, worsen their emotional wellbeing, or impact whether they feel safe at their workplace, school or in their community. 

It can be hard if someone close to you lets you know they’ve been harassed or assaulted. It's normal to feel unsure about what to say or do. Listening to them without judgement, believing what they say, and asking the best way you can be there for them, is a great way to start.

Experiencing sexual abuse often leaves victim-survivors feeling powerless, so it’s important they regain control by making their own choices. You can mention resources like helplines and counselling services, but let them decide if and when to report. Telling them that you’ll be there for whatever they decide to do, and respecting those choices, is a sure bet. 

When we understand all forms of sexual harassment and assault, we’re better at taking action, supporting a friend, and recognising when we’ve been subjected to it. 

Every form of sexual harassment and sexual assault contributes to a culture where sexual violence is normalised. It goes beyond legal definitions, too. It's actually about upholding the right for every person to feel safe and respected within their lives.

If you think you may have experienced sexual violence, know there are free and accessible supports to help you through this. Explore your options and reach out here: Get Support